Why Focusing on What You Have (Not What You Lack) Changes Everything After 50
Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash
The Gratitude Shift That Changes Everything
I’ve lived long enough to learn one of life’s most important lessons: gratitude isn’t just a nice idea—it’s a survival skill. At 73, I’ve discovered that focusing on what I have instead of what I don’t have has completely changed how I experience each day.
When I was younger, I was always chasing the next thing. I watched young people around me collecting trucks, motorcycles, and countless possessions, jumping from one pursuit to another like they were “jackrabbiting around.” I did the same thing. But age has taught me something different.
The Comparison Trap
The biggest enemy of gratitude is comparison. When we look at what others have, more money, better relationships, nicer homes—we rob ourselves of joy. I learned this the hard way. Every time I compared my life to someone else’s, my attitude shifted from appreciation to resentment.
Here’s what I know now: you have one life. You’re born, you’ll die, and everything in between is your story. We must make the best of what we have while still working toward our goals. But when we can’t get everything, we want (and who can?), we need to step back and be grateful for what’s already in our lives.
The Age Factor
Something interesting happens as you get older, gratitude becomes clearer. When you’re young, you want to have, to accumulate, to achieve. There’s nothing wrong with that drive, but it can blind you to what’s already good in your life.
Now, I pay attention to “the scenery around us.” I notice the small moments, the simple pleasures, the relationships that matter. I’ve learned that some people will get different amounts of things in life, and some face more challenges than others. That’s just reality.
Living Gratefully
Being grateful doesn’t mean giving up on your dreams or settling for less. It means appreciating your current circumstances while still working toward improvement. When I can’t achieve something, I want, I try to look at my life and find reasons to be thankful.
This practice has made me happier, more content, and better at relationships. When you’re grateful for what you have, you become a more positive person to be around. You stop complaining as much and start celebrating the good things that are already there.
Gratitude is a constant choice. Every day, I must decide whether to focus on what’s missing or appreciate what’s present. The older I get, the easier this choice becomes, because I understand how precious and limited our time really is.
Questions to Ponder Over
- What three things in your life do you take for granted that someone else would be grateful to have?
- How has comparing yourself to others affected your happiness, and what would change if you stopped doing it today?
- If you only had one year left to live, what aspects of your current life would you suddenly appreciate more deeply?
